1 00:00:01,780 --> 00:00:05,500 I recently discovered something startling about myself. 2 00:00:05,500 --> 00:00:09,520 It turns out that I’m a racist, sexist, misogynist. 3 00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:12,520 This came as quite a shock to me. 4 00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:14,560 How did this happen? 5 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:19,420 As a person of color, a single woman with a graduate degree who grew up poor in a home 6 00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:23,740 without a father, I had a clear political path to follow. 7 00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:25,100 And I followed it. 8 00:00:25,100 --> 00:00:28,660 I voted for Barack Obama…twice. 9 00:00:28,660 --> 00:00:31,880 After all, we share the same skin color. 10 00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:33,860 His father was from Africa. 11 00:00:33,860 --> 00:00:35,600 Mine was, too! 12 00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:38,320 What other reasons did I need? 13 00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:42,640 I was inspired to see a black man rise to the highest office in the land. 14 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:48,600 I believed his ascent would herald a new beginning, a new era of racial healing and harmony. 15 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:54,740 We would finally have that frank discussion about race that everyone always talks about. 16 00:00:54,740 --> 00:00:57,120 I was also inspired by his wife. 17 00:00:57,120 --> 00:01:02,300 I was thrilled to see such a strong, opinionated black woman take the national stage. 18 00:01:02,300 --> 00:01:06,280 But then something happened… actually, several somethings. 19 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:09,860 I realized there was a big contradiction in my own life. 20 00:01:09,860 --> 00:01:13,520 I considered myself a free‐thinker, but I was thinking exactly 21 00:01:13,530 --> 00:01:15,760 what I was supposed to. 22 00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:18,400 I decided to start asking questions. 23 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:21,250 I belonged to several campus feminist groups. 24 00:01:21,250 --> 00:01:24,240 I was even teaching feminism to inner city girls. 25 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:27,660 Part of that teaching involved making the case for abortion. 26 00:01:27,660 --> 00:01:30,140 These girls needed to know that they had the right 27 00:01:30,140 --> 00:01:33,320 to make decisions about their own bodies. 28 00:01:33,320 --> 00:01:37,180 Surely, I thought, that’s empowerment. 29 00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:43,560 But one day I asked myself: Isn’t it men who benefit most from consequence free sex? 30 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:46,800 Doesn’t that give them even more power over women? 31 00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:50,480 And, of course, abortion certainly doesn’t empower the women 32 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:53,060 it prevents from ever being born. 33 00:01:53,060 --> 00:01:57,120 When I began to ask my other feminist friends how they reconciled these issues, 34 00:01:57,120 --> 00:01:58,740 they just got angry. 35 00:01:58,740 --> 00:02:00,540 I was called anti‐woman. 36 00:02:00,540 --> 00:02:02,980 Even by progressive men! 37 00:02:02,980 --> 00:02:05,860 But I’m not anti‐woman, I thought. 38 00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:07,740 I am a woman! 39 00:02:07,750 --> 00:02:09,990 I just don’t want to be a weak one. 40 00:02:09,990 --> 00:02:12,760 I want to be strong… like Michelle. 41 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:18,100 At about the same time, while I was a student at the University of Texas at Dallas, 42 00:02:18,100 --> 00:02:24,040 the UT Austin Department of African Diaspora Studies released a statement in which they said, 43 00:02:24,040 --> 00:02:30,140 and I quote, “African Americans are disproportionately affected by the saturation of our society 44 00:02:30,140 --> 00:02:36,880 by firearms … We demand that firearms be banned in all spaces occupied by black people 45 00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:38,320 on our campus.” 46 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:40,140 Wait a second, I thought. 47 00:02:40,140 --> 00:02:43,760 Why would you want to ban firearms only in black areas? 48 00:02:43,760 --> 00:02:46,450 Doesn’t that mean that you either think black people are more 49 00:02:46,450 --> 00:02:50,460 dangerous than other people, or less worthy of protection? 50 00:02:50,460 --> 00:02:53,780 These questions did not endear me to my progressive friends. 51 00:02:53,780 --> 00:02:57,080 I was called a race traitor… even by white people. 52 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:59,380 But I’m not anti‐black. 53 00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,299 I am black. 54 00:03:01,299 --> 00:03:05,519 I just want to be safe, like Barack. 55 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:10,660 I realized I didn’t have a good answer; I only had more questions 56 00:03:10,660 --> 00:03:14,060 ‐‐ like why were blacks doing so poorly in cities that had 57 00:03:14,060 --> 00:03:16,540 been run by Democrats for decades? 58 00:03:16,540 --> 00:03:21,920 Was it racism and sexism that was holding people back, or was it something else? 59 00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:25,580 The more questions I asked the less popular I became. 60 00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:27,720 But here’s the funny thing. 61 00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:31,760 I started feeling better about myself. 62 00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:38,460 I decided that the very definition of empowerment required me to take responsibility for my own life. 63 00:03:38,460 --> 00:03:41,040 I wasn’t going to be anyone’s victim. 64 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:43,340 Which meant I had to protect myself. 65 00:03:43,340 --> 00:03:44,700 So, I bought a gun. 66 00:03:44,700 --> 00:03:47,260 I started to advocate for gun rights. 67 00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:49,320 That cost me more friends. 68 00:03:49,329 --> 00:03:53,219 I joined the pro‐life movement and walked in The March for Life. 69 00:03:53,220 --> 00:03:55,360 More friends... gone. 70 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:57,480 Then, I crossed the line. 71 00:03:57,489 --> 00:04:02,559 I voted Republican, the party that views me as an empowered individual, able to shape 72 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:08,160 my own destiny, not as a member of a victim group. 73 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:14,340 And that’s how I became a racist, sexist, misogynist. 74 00:04:14,340 --> 00:04:19,240 I’m Antonia Okafor for Prager University.